Login | Lost Password | Help | Rules | Register

Most Recent

New Year's Eve by Bijou PG
Luke finds the letter Noah wrote him on New Year's Eve 2008 and plans a surprise.
The Darkening Skies by drivencrazy R
Luke knows he'll need to fight for Noah. He has a few ideas.
Our Love Is Stronger by no1nukelover PG
Luke and Noah are about to see each other for the first time since Noah left for LA! Let's see how this goes!
A Different Kind of Family by SarahSezLove PG
A single sentence makes Noah question what kind of family he and Luke can make together. An abandoned kitten may just hold the answer.
The Other Man by jb1183 PG-13
Noah arrives home from a tour in the Army a few days before Christmas and sees Luke with another man.

Featured

Safe House by European Orchid NC-17
Luke finds that working as a researcher for a security company comes with unexpected events.
"Forgiveness...

Random Story

A misunderstanding of sorts by jberri79 R
Luke goes to far, Noah doesn't handle it well, at all.

Site Info

We are home to 185 authors and 4396 members. In total, there have been 28018 reviews written about the 992 fanfictions posted on this site. Our newest member is FaithRene.

Shoutbox

scj0710
06/15/17 09:45 pm
Ten years...wow! Very cool Tonya - thank you. I look forward to exploring the new layouts!!
Tonya
06/14/17 05:34 pm
I hope you all like the new layouts! :)
Tonya
06/06/17 10:39 am
Congrats to Tala Ashe (Amerra) on joining the cast of Legends of Tomorrow!
Tonya
06/05/17 04:10 pm
Thanks for those reminders @scj0710 and @abohannon35! I can't believe its been 10 years!
abohannon35
06/01/17 06:42 am
gotta say Happy Birthday to Jake Silbermann. ps. I love this site
scj0710
05/31/17 09:44 pm
June 1-Ten years ago Noah walked into WOAK and Nuke was born. Thank you to Tonya, European Orchid and everyone else who make this site such a perfect place to visit, read some great stories & relax!
Tonya
05/28/17 09:57 pm
Thank you to the two recent donors! Thanks to you two and the 2 earlier donors, the site is now paid for thru the next several months! Thanks so much, everyone!
Tonya
05/28/17 09:52 pm
Thanks @European Orchid! I thought that username looked sketchy the other day but i didn't want to delete it w/o proof it was spam. Should have trusted my instinct!
European Orchid
05/28/17 08:35 pm
spamaccount detected. I'm on it. will remove reviews and block account.
Tonya
05/23/17 03:02 pm
Thank you very much, @amythesw & sorry for the trouble you were having! Thanks also to the 1 other person who made a donation! I appreciate both greatly!
Shout Archive

Poll

Which layout do you like best?

Timeless Elegance
Timeless Elegance 25%
3 Column Fullscreen
3 Column Fullscreen 0%
Adrift in Dreams
Adrift in Dreams 0%
Enchanted
Enchanted 25%
Frosted
Frosted 25%
Hotness
Hotness 25%
Vision
Vision 0%
Poll Archive

Support This Site

Donate towards my web hosting bill!

Who's Online

Guests: 5
Members:

From the Heart

by ficnic
Story Notes:

When: Begins at the conclusion of the television show. I'll date where/when the story is by month and year. I'll sometimes break up the same scene into several chapters to make it easier for me to proofread.

This is my first go at writing these characters, and very nearly my first fanfic of any kind (it's #2).  Feedback and constructive criticism, therefore, is welcome and appreciated.  If I'm botching it immensely, let me know.

Chapter Notes:

Time/Place:  Noah's first full day in Los Angeles

September 17, 2010

Noah Mayer didn't so much have a headache. It would be more accurate to say he felt like anchored chains had been maliciously wrapped around his ankles, then blithely tossed into the deepest ocean. As he sunk further and further into the icy depths, the pain of pressure building in his head was nothing sort of vicious.

Luke. The single word, a handful of letters that once again commanded his every thought, every feeling, every action. As he lay sprawled face-up in the middle of his bed, Noah realized almost incredulously that he was going to cry. Again.

If he hadn't been so fucking miserable, he might've laughed. Noah Mayer, the Prince of Avoidance, was suddenly so damn in touch with his emotions he could choke on them. He thought back to the very recent past, remembering that when the going got tough, all he did was push his feelings away, with every last ounce of his strength.

Of course, doing that meant he'd had to push Luke away, too. Because what was Luke, if not the primary object of so damn many of his feelings? And when he wouldn't deal with them, he couldn't deal with Luke.

Noah's throat actually burned from swallowing the sob that fought to surface at that thought. After spending his first day in L.A. endlessly reproaching himself for every last thing he'd ever done wrong with Luke, not only was he exhausted; he was physically raw. Yet somehow a sore throat and throbbing head were welcome. They distracted him from the overwhelming heartbreak, if only a little.

And there was no doubt about it. Reid Oliver was dead, and in a twist so surreal he couldn't have dreamed it up for a film, Noah's heart was unquestionably broken. Now there was another thought he normally would've laughed at.

He couldn't help but wonder if wherever Reid was, he was amused, anyway. Noah hoped so. The idea gave him a small sense of comfort. Like somehow, if Reid was some sort of bizarre angel, sitting on high and tossing out his customary barbs as he watched the world below, then Luke wouldn't have completely lost the man he loved.

Reid. The man Luke loved. Not Noah. GOD, how that hurt to admit; though now, for different reasons. When Reid was alive, Noah could lie to himself. So easily he'd allowed himself to believe that what was between Luke and Reid was just a rebound romance. A passing phase; just another pesky obstacle in the epic love story of Luke and Noah.

In that scenario, no matter what Luke said, Noah had a chance with him. In Noah's mind, Luke was still in love with him, but Noah had pushed him so far away, it was going to take more time, effort, and patience than ever before to get him back. While Noah wasn't happy with the state of things, he could tell himself it was ok because eventually, he would win Luke back.

Then Reid pulled the ace out of his sleeve. Though admittedly, Noah doubted he'd see it that way. Dr. Reid Oliver, in a race against time to save a dying man, pulled his car out in front of a train. Noah knew there was no way around it; Reid died heroically.

A part of Noah wished he'd already left Oakdale before it happened. That he'd broken contact with everyone, and never even known about it. Because when that train hit Reid's car, Noah's shit hit the fan. When he got the news, every pathetic lie Noah had told himself, every last self-deception crumbled spectacularly. His immediate reaction to Reid's death was abject horror. Because he knew. He knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt; Luke loved the man.

And in knowing that, or at least finally acknowledging it, Noah saw the enormity of what had happened. When he'd heard the news, Noah didn't take time to mourn for himself, for the realization that Luke's love was lost to him. Without trying, for once Noah Mayer uncharacteristically got over himself, because he recognized what the hell had just happened to Luke.

The man Luke loved, the man Luke was in love with, had just been killed. Just like that. Allison had told Noah that Luke needed him, and he'd wanted to go to him. To at least be there; to just offer Luke the unwavering support he needed and deserved. Still, Noah had hesitated. He hadn't known how Luke would react to his presence; whether Luke could even stand the sight of him now. Would Luke wish it was Noah who'd died instead?

Noah had immediately chastised himself for the grotesque thought. Luke wasn't like that. Luke was good and kind and loving … and hurting, dammit! Even momentarily entertaining the idea that Luke would wish him dead was sickening. Noah knew it had only sprung from his jealousy; that apparently hadn't died with Reid Oliver. He still felt bitter envy towards the doctor, even now.

Recognizing that he begrudged a dead man the love Luke had given him instead of Noah, Noah couldn't help but feel so damn... petty.

You must login (register) to review.